They say absence makes the hard grow fonder. Well, it’s been a long time since I last posted and I’m not sure anyone was missing me! But either way, I’m back.

Wish I could say my absence was for good reasons. Unfortunately it wasn’t. Much of the last few months has been spent in a holding pattern, waiting out hours, days and weeks waiting for improvement with a very dear family member who underwent brain surgery. Why these things happen I don’t know. Why some people make it through unscathed and others are permanently altered I don’t always understand. Knowing its a possibility doesn’t make it any better though for it’s one of those things you don’t honestly believe will ever happen to you…and yet it did occur in our family. It has been an emotional rollercoaster. One I’ll surely write about some day.

The part I feel the worst about is the way it has impacted my children. There were many days of seeing mommy cry, daddy sad, the two of our zombies walking about, gone at the hospital and much more. I feel like they lost out on summer. Sure, we still did lots of things…but the super mom plan I had to make summer incredibly awesome filled with scavenger hunts, fort building, Lego mechanisms, science experiments and endless trips to the library all dissolved. I know such is life. I know things happen. But our sadness, our grief, our exhaustion….it did impact them and I wish I could have made the experience better. We have been improving our expression of these emotions and now allowing the kids to see their papa in his current state, but that in itself is incredible difficult as well.

This is just a phase of life and will change like all other things. For now we are riding the storm waves and holding our breath to see where things lead us.

Sorry for my absence. I can’t promise it won’t happen again, but I will attempt to be better about keeping up with my writing. Have a wonderful day everyone!